Patrick stood on
the porch. The ceiling light glinted on his honey-blond hair. She left the car
and walked to the porch.
"Welcome
home. Long night." His deep voice promised security.
For an instant,
she thought of finding forgetfulness in his arms the way she had the night Jim
had died. But that encounter had nearly destroyed their friendship.
Tears spilled
down her cheeks. Were they for Barbara, herself or some unknown reason? She
fought to control feelings of helplessness. If Patrick saw her as weak, he
would react the same way Jim had. She never wanted to be smothered again.
He reached for
her hand. "Don't tell me you knew the nurse I heard about on the police
band."
She nodded.
"I found the body." She fumbled in her purse for the house key.
Patrick put his arm around her shoulders. For a moment, she leaned against him.
"I'll be all right."
"I know,
but it must have been a brutal shock. If you need a shoulder, mine's
broad." He plucked the keys from her hand and opened the door.
She dropped her
coat on the arm of the couch. A splotch of dried blood stained the right knee
of her uniform. She gasped. Why hadn't someone told her?
She felt
unclean. Her skin itched. She wanted to tear off the uniform. As she hurried to
the stairs, she unfastened the buttons of her white shirt. "I have to
shower."
The note of
panic in Susan's voice drew Patrick to the stairs. When she turned, he saw the
bloodstained knee of her uniform. He gripped the newel post. She must have
found the body not long after the woman had been killed. His muscles tensed.
Had the murderer seen her?
Long after she
vanished, he remained at the foot of the steps. He wanted to follow her, to
hold her, to protect her. She might be in danger. What if she had seen
something that could identify the killer?
He released his
held breath and walked to the kitchen. There, he measured coffee and turned on
the machine. While the coffee brewed, he returned to the living room and took a
bottle of brandy from the antique icebox Susan used as a bar.
Memories of the
night Jim died arose. He had held Susan in his arms. A light kiss meant to
offer comfort had ignited passion. He had forgotten her grief, forgotten his
friend and had drowned in the heady sensations of making love with the woman he
had wanted for years. The shock of hearing her call him Jim had iced his
desire.
For months after
the funeral, she had avoided him. Though he had understood and shared the
guilt, he had feared they would never regain what had been lost. This past
summer, they had become friends again, but he wanted more. Sometimes, he
thought his desire for her had become an obsession.
Patrick leaned
against the counter. He loved her, but she had to be more secure about her
ability to deal with life before she would be ready for a relationship.
He reached for
two mugs hanging from hooks above the kitchen table, poured coffee and laced
Susan's with brandy. Just as she came down the stairs, he entered the living
room. His body reacted to the gentle sway of her light brown caftan.
She sat on one
end of the couch and tucked her feet under her. After taking the mug in
her hands, she sipped and coughed. "You should have warned me."
"The
perfect antidote for tonight's shock. Will help you sleep."
"Thanks,
and thank you for the flowers." She leaned forward and stroked one of the
chrysanthemums with a finger.
Patrick imagined
her touching him in the same way. He lifted his mug. "Who was
killed?"
"Barbara
Denton."
"The
infamous Barbara?"
"The very
one."
"Any idea
why?"
She cradled the
coffee mug between her hands. "I think she was blackmailing someone."
The instincts
Patrick had honed when he'd been a crime reporter rose to the surface.
"Someone you work with?"
She looked up.
"I don't know."
Who was she
protecting? "What made you think of blackmail?"
"There was
money scattered--" She leaned against the back of the couch. "Even
talking about the murder makes me sick. I didn't like her, but I like the way
she died even less." She put the mug on the end table.
"More?"
he asked.
She shook her
head. "I want to curl into a fetal position and stay that way for a
month."
"What would
that solve?" He put his hand on her shoulder.
"Nothing. I
don't want to go to work tomorrow."
"Call in
sick."
"They won't
buy that. I'm just back from vacation."
"Ask for a
different unit."
"Transfers
take months."
He inched
closer. "You don't have to stay at Bradley Memorial. What about home
care?"
"Would you
leave the newspaper for a magazine?"
Even when the
erratic hours had destroyed his marriage, he hadn't considered changing jobs.
"You win."
Susan stretched.
"You've helped me answer a question I've been asking myself all evening. I
don't want to leave the hospital."
"Have you
considered a different shift?"
"I
might." She spoke through a yawn.
"I'd better
go. Will you be all right?" He reached for her hand. If she asked, he
would gladly stay.
"Thanks for
being here."
He tapped her
chin with his fingers. "Remember, I'm just a wall away. Bang three times
and I'll be over."
"You're a
good man, Patrick Macleith."
Her reaction
wasn't the one he wanted, but for now, her admiration was enough. He pushed
aside the urge to take her into his arms. Moving too fast would scare her. He
rose and reached for his black jacket. "Would you like to have
Thanksgiving dinner at my place? The twins will be here."
"I'm
working."
"Then we'll
eat at noon. Will you come?"
"Only if I
can bring something?"
"The pies.
Your crusts are terrific. Come early and help."
"What
time?"
"Nine
thirty. We'll watch the parades."
She walked to
the door with him. "Again, thanks."
He jammed his
hands in his jacket pockets and crossed the porch to his side of the large
house. How much longer could he be with her without betraying his feelings? If
he let her know how he felt, he was sure she would back away again.
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